Thursday, September 22, 2016

I'll Take My Coffee Black

     This morning--I drank my coffee black.  I used to hate coffee--too bitter!  Until college... when I had my first sip of a delicious caramel frappuccino... Step one.  Pretty soon, the slight bitter zing of coffee (disguised by the dessert in a cup) lost its oomph.  A little less sugar, a little less milk.  Frappucinos became lattes became coffee with milk (soy), became just a bit of creamer... and now this.  A morning where I drank (and wanted) my coffee black.
     This morning--I have been sad.  I used to hate being sad--too bitter!  But being naive to the brokenness of this world can't last forever.  I have long sugared-up the pain presented to me by stuffing hard news with invented excuses "oh, I'm sure that person didn't really mean X, Y, Z", by straining out hurt and confused feelings while sprinkling on lots of distractions, and even by adding the whipped cream topper: "look at the bright side."  But little by little, I'm using less and less sweetener.  Less ignoring, less walls, less distractions, less optimistic write-offs... and now this.  A morning where I have been (and wanted to be) sad.
     Because there are some kinds of sadness that are right.  It's the kind of sadness that comes when I watch a boy we have poured into for the past two years make the decision to leave Micah and return to the streets.  The sadness that comes when I think of him shivering and cold, decidedly dismissing our roof of protection and circle of love.  It's a sadness that comes when a friend I once shared all my thoughts, dreams, hurts, and hopes with is no longer with me and can no longer hear me... nor I her.  It's a sadness that comes when I read one of my boys' writing: "I am choosing to reject Jesus, because I am living my own life." What life?  It's a sadness that comes when I see everyone, all of us, making the same decision to live for ourselves and because of that not really living at all.  It's a sadness that comes when I read about the crowd that waved palm trees before that Jesus, ready to make him king, and the very next week shouting "Crucify him!"  It's a sadness when I wonder "Am I a part of that crowd?"  It's a sadness, a deep sadness, that comes when I see us wanting to kill God.
     There is a bitterness that isn't meant to be sugared down.  There is pain.  There is injustice.  There is sin, and there are consequences.  And it is sad.
     And that's okay.
     I don't know if okay is even the right word, but I accept the sadness.  I think that's part of all this--being here, living.  There is a lot of sadness...

     You know, coffee is an intricate experience--when you've been at it long enough.  Strip away all the additives and there are so many flavours to be explored!  It's crazy to me that there are people who can drink a cup of coffee and know what country the beans came from!  But that's not how the coffee journey starts (at least from my experience).  All coffee (at first) tastes like, well, coffee.  Bitter and gross.  But with time and refined taste, what once was bitter becomes beautiful.
     Sadness is like that.  At least, the sadness I am talking about.  Because though I'm still sad, I'm also joyful.  I can't explain it.  The deeper the sadness, the fuller the joy.  Not mixed, but separate... and yet together.  Each flavour highlighting the other.
     Because... the saddest thing I can think of is the cross.  Jesus, our Lord and God who only ever loved us and lived life right, suffered for you and for me.  He suffered.  The pain of this world?  He faced--sugarless.  Bitter.  Death.
    Because.... the most beautiful, joyful thing I can think of is the cross.  Jesus, our Lord and God loved us and lived life right, he suffered for you and me.  The pain of this world? He faced--sugarless.  Bitter.  Death.  To bring LIFE.  True life.  Life that no longer separates us from the Father. Life that brings us into his presence and enables us to know him--beautiful wonderful him.  Life that lasts forever.
     There are so many flavours to be experienced.  And I am not afraid of any of them.  With hope there is hurt.  With beauty there is pain.  But I can taste them all knowing that my Saviour lives.  He himself was a man of many sorrows... And yet he promised us his joy.  A joy that he endured the cross for, scorning its shame, that we may be with him forever.
    And so, give me my coffee black.  I want to see this world for what it is, but even moreso, I want to see Jesus for who he is.  Yes, through all the bitterness, I taste and see that God is good.

Monday, September 12, 2016

Remember Who You Are

SIMBA:
So many things to tell her,
But how to make her see?
The truth about my past--impossible!
She'd turn away from me...

NALA:
He's holding back, he's hiding
But what I can't decide
Why won't he be the king I know he is?
The king I see inside

     If you skipped over those lyrics, go back.  Read them.  Simba has something to teach us about ourselves--who knew?!
     Read them?  Okay good.  Then listen up...

REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE!

     Simba, born to be king.  A lion, born to be courageous--a fighter.  And yet what does he do when circumstances scream death?  He flees.  Why?  Scar, his secret and deceptive enemy, convinces him that he does not belong.  He convinces him that the world would be better off if he were not in it.  He makes him forget his identity--as king.
     Why am I telling you this?  Because we also have an Enemy, and he, too, is cunning, deceptive, and wants to take over the throne--of your life, of mine, and of this world.  And in so many ways we have let him.  We have let the Enemy chase us off into Hakuna-Matata Land and convince us that eating bugs is a delicacy!  Living in our own little universes, blind to the battle being waged around us, we keep looking for pleasure after pleasure to satisfy our roaring appetites.  Vine swinging from dating relationship to dating relationship, grub-gorging in chips bag after chips bag, thrill seeking in vacation after vacation.  Not that these are always bad things, but at the expense of what?  Is there something we are missing?  Where are we being called to FIGHT?
     We have an Enemy.  1 Peter 5:8 says, "Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour."  How does he do this?  Discouragement, complacency, laziness, shame, insecurity, fear.  Shall I go on?  Our enemy is always a LYIN' (get it?! lion---lyin...).  He wants to kick us out of his territory and lull us into sleepy-living, because he knows the Lion KING is on our side.  The lion of the tribe of Judah.  Our Lord Jesus, who when we believe in him, has given us his spirit.  He has given us what we need to fight.
     And I'll tell you where I am called to fight: remembering who I am.  Not so far off from our furry friend, is it?  First step for Simba to return to his homeland and claim what is rightfully his: remembering who he is.  And who is he?  His father's son.  Who is his father?  King.  And guess what?  So is mine.  So is yours.  But how often do we let the fear of our past grip us--convincing us that we are just a sham, a coward, a nobody?  This is an attack of the Enemy--who doesn't want us to come back and live into the victory of the TRUE king!  The victory the Lord Jesus has already won for us in his death and resurrection.
     My brothers and sisters, this is a call to battle.  This is Nala calling out the Simbas.  You aren't dead, you are alive.  SO LIVE.  Look to Christ.  Find your confidence in him.  Stop letting the Enemy lure you away and convince you that the darkness of the Shadowlands means that it is time to go to sleep.  NO!  Instead of fear, put your confidence in Him.  "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me" (Ps 23:4).  Instead of insecurity, remember whose say matters.  "If God is for us, who can be against us" (Rom 8:31)!  Instead of surrendering to your weakness, find your strength in Him.  "Be strong in the Lord and in his might" (Eph 6:10)!  Have your weapons at the ready--cling to the Word of God!
     And now I'll go back to the song that began all this: Can you feel the love tonight? Nala's love for Simba reminded him of who he was and brought him back to where he was meant to be.  How much more, then, should the love of Christ woo us and bring us into the life he died for us to have?  Can you feel the love tonight?  If you can't, look to Jesus.  Look to the cross.  Look to the empty tomb.  That's love.  And so, by the strength of his power, let's go fight.  Remembering who we are, let's go love.

(My ladies bible study group is currently going through "The Armor of God" by Priscilla Shirer.  If you Ladies in particular want to dig deeper, I highly recommend doing this study!)

A Cup of Water

For truly, I say to you, whoever gives you a cup of water to drink because you belong to Christ will by no means lose his reward. Mark 9:41 ...