Trusting through the Transition

"Foxes have holes and the birds of the air have nests, but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head." --Luke 9:58

Every single day I have been in Houston I have seen a butterfly.  Whether it's a monarch that flies in my path or a pair of earrings worn by someone I meet, butterflies just keep turning up.  It's not really an emotional or exciting experience for me--it's more like my manna: my daily reminder that God is with me.  And like the Israelites in the desert, there are days when it doesn't quite feel enough.  God, I know you're with me, but are you sure this is where I'm supposed to be?  Am I doing any good here?  Did you really bring me here.  Each butterfly, though I often don't even realize it, and frankly sometimes I feel sick of it (though I know I'm not), is my little reminder: "Yes, Kelsey, I brought you here.  Yes, Kelsey, I am with you.  Keep going."  Alright, God, I'll keep going.  I don't feel at home yet, but I'll trust you.  It's not easy, but I will...

The last couple of weeks have helped me develop somewhat of a routine.  I am still waiting on my car (it's coming tomorrow!), so I've been transportationally at others' disposal.  This is a humbling yet rewarding experience.  It's difficult to constantly ask for help knowing I'm interrupting others' schedules, but through my reliance on others my schedule has become subject to theirs.  I'm learning submission and being content wherever and with whoever.  Not only that, but my lack in the vehicle department has allowed me extra time with friends like Hannah Rode.  I love how much time I've gotten to spend with her--she's becoming more like family.  It's amazing to me how valuable the relationship becomes when we spend time just BEing together--not arranging for a meeting and a life catch-up, but just doing daily life with someone else.  And Hannah is a wonderful, encouraging, inspiring woman of the Lord, and I am extremely thankfully that God has placed us in each other's lives for such a time as this.

I am getting adjusted to my job here at A. D. Players a bit better, too.  The office (PR) side is still going to take some work.  I've spent a lot of my time at jobs and in environments where I am constantly living into my gifts and passions.  PR, at least for now, is not exactly what I'd call my "calling" in life.  I'm not bad at it, but it's definitely more of a "job."  Such is life, but I'm seeking ways to enjoy myself and to learn, while also waiting on God in hopes that once I've proved myself faithful he has something more up his sleeve that will really tap into how he has uniquely created me.  I'm especially hoping that pretty soon I'll be able to get involved with TAA (Theater Arts Academy) here so I can be around kids again.  Taking a break from being with kids, though, has been a great reminder for me that I really do love it.

I also had two auditions here last week.  I have yet to hear back about them, but even a simple 30 minute session of reading from a script gave me the boost of energy/joy I needed to re-excite me about this place.  I felt good about the auditions, too.  I may not have gotten either role (although I hope I did!), but either way I walked out confident that this is something God has gifted me in.  I have a lot to learn/grow, but this is definitely an appropriate path for me.

OH!  And suuuuuper cool audition story!  At our first audition, we each had to take a form and a writing utensil.  I didn't take the time to pick my preference, I just grabbed whatever I could get.  As I was filling out my sheet, I noticed that the pencil I had nonchalantly grabbed was A SPIDERMAN PENCIL.  Of all the pencils I could have gotten, I GOT A SPIDERMAN PENCIL!?!  And the fact that they even had a SPIDERMAN pencil boggled my mind.  I literally danced around when this happened, much to the confusion/disinterest of everyone around me...  I didn't care ;).  In that moment I knew, God is with me.  It doesn't even matter if I get the part or not, because the God of the universe cares about me enough to give me a SPIDERMAN pencil.  Haha.  Ya, I probably sound silly, but for me, it's the little things in life that bring me the most joy!  (In case you don't know me that well/couldn't figure it out from my repetition and caps lock usage--I really love Spiderman).

Other than that... Ten random insights into life a la Kelsey: 1.) I love my friends/family/mentors--thank you for all the encouragement and support!  2.) Traffic/driving is crazy confusing here.  3.)  I still lose everything--some things never change   4.)  No, I still will not go on blind dates with your 30 year old friends, Ben  5.)  Clay pens are just as fun to make at home as they are at camp  6.)  Good community/living for God is harder to find outside college, but it'll get there  7.) Andy Stanley sermons are THE BEST--northpoint.org/messages, check 'em out!   8.) dancing around like a maniac never gets old--especially when done with close friends  9.)  I miss me some Manna Church and good ol' Camp Geneva  10.) One of the exciting but absolute hardest thing about transitions is that nobody knows where you've been.  Yes, it's fun to start new things, but I am really learning to appreciate how beautiful it is to be known.